Opinion

Giving a woman diamond jewelry “… profess a message of love and fidelity … (Winfrey).”

DeLeary wrote, “Diamond … capture the eye and heart of its beholder … as a symbol of love … for its timeless  beauty … (2008).”  Basically, diamonds carry a message of bravery, strength and everlasting love for a person; right?

Diamond

I think it’s in our nature, as women, to adore things that are shiny and pretty!  You might say and think, “You are stereotyping,” but come on ladies let’s be honest – I think diamond rings are so PRETTY (even today)!!

I used to have pretty one carat (well little bit over) diamond engagement ring, and I had it over four years before my husband and I decided to get rid of it.

You might be wondering why I got rid of it and let me assure you that I didn’t see the ring to pay our bills, but political and humane reason — “Blood Diamonds” or “Conflict Diamonds.”

It was a late evening when we watched a documentary on Blood Diamonds, and it changed our lives forever. 

Symbol of diamonds are simple – wealth, elegance and love; however, “… several African nations … means to power, reasons to terrorize millions of innocent civilians, and may have been helped finance some of the world’s most brutal terrorists (Blood Diamonds).”

In many instance, “Rebel armies have forced tens of thousands of people to mine diamonds in brutal, dangerous conditions under the threat of death, their pay as paltry as a cup of rice per day (Blood Diamonds).”

The worst things about this extortion of human lives are that many of these workers are children (especially young girls – no older than 8 years old) where many families sell their daughters to these mining companies.

Before I go on a personal journey to boycott diamonds, there has been legitimate diamonds (e.g. diamonds recovered in Canada ensuring human rights issues and not exploiting children, and etc) readily available in the market.

However, like anything else diamonds are exchanged and changed from one hand to other hand – it’s like illegal drugs; they’ll find ways.

With that said, “Certificate of Origin” regime ensures only legitimate diamonds reaches the market, and additional controls by Member States and the diamond industry (and online directories) to better ensure such process – BUT, I have my doubts. 

Sierra Leone

Alright, back to Conflict Diamonds in Sierra Leone (a atrocity of RUF)  – Intentional Mutilation of Non-Combatant Civilians of more than 20,000 people. 

The hands and legs were severed by axes and machete for the purpose of military strategies – to induce tectonic plate shift of population shift flow away from the diamond mines.

It’s heartbreaking to see men, women, and especially children walking (sometimes hobbling) about with one leg, or seeing a young girl with a missing hand(s) or an arm, and etc – it makes me stick.

My family and I try to incorporate and practice our religious beliefs with humanistic philosophy  — i.e. affectionate to other human beings, value human lives, make right and meaningful choices, threat others the way you wanted to be treated, and etc – basically, being a good person.

Thankfully, with global awareness of these conflict diamonds or blood diamonds, many men and women are boycotting against diamonds.

If you didn’t know, many are opting towards diamond alternatives such as man-made diamonds (Cubic Zirconia, Russian Diamonds, Moissanite, White Sapphire, and Gemisis Culture Diamond) because of price and social/political reasons.

Cecil Adams, award winning newspaper columnist, said “Diamonds are a con, pure and simple (Man-Made Diamonds, A Buyer’s Guide),” and many who can afford the real things are opting towards man-made or synthetic diamonds. 

Even today, diamonds are largely controlled by DeBeers, and they artificially inflate and control diamond scarcity; which in turn influences the cost of the diamonds.

Furthermore, studies show that 1 out of 3 diamonds sold in US are artificially inflated in value, or average couple paying 40% or more for their engagement rings – funny, huh?

Well there it is.  Sorry if I bummed you out, but it is important to know the truth – after you know the truth than you can make up your mind; whatever it maybe.

For me – I rather have a fake stone than a real stone – I rather sleep well at night, and hoping I saved a kid’s hand or arms or legs.

"NO" to Diamonds

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Blood Diamonds.  History.com  Retrieved from http://www.history.com/minisites/blooddiamonds (1/26/09).
DeLeary, K.  Choose Romantic Diamond Jewelry.  http://gemstones.suite101.com/article.cfm/choose_romantic_diamond_jewelry (1/29/09).
Man-Made Diamonds, A Buyer’s Guide.  (2005)  Retrieved from http://www.diamondnexuslabs.com/newsdesk_info.php?newsPath=1&newsdesk_id=3 (1/26/09).
Winfrey, M. With Diamond Engagement Rings the Message Could Not Be Clearer.  Retrieved from http://searchwarp.com/swa413846.htm (1/26/09).

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Is it me or am I the only person who can’t afford UGG boots?

Famous UGGs

We have been having snow for few days, and all the boots are coming out!  Everywhere I turn I see people wearing UGG boots – women, children, and even infant babies!

However, I have also seen people wearing their UGGs all year around!!

Misfit UGGs

I know I am that fashion conscious anymore, but it’s really funny to see people wearing their boots in 90 degrees weather!  I guess they have to show off what they have; right?

I was curious last night about the boots (and the price), and decide to Google it.  There were many websites selling them, but I decided to research UGG’s official webpage.

If you didn’t know about UGG products here are some information.

According to the company’s Product Statement, “…the finest materials are used … highest quality leathers and suedes, … the world’s finest sheepskin.  UGG Australia is the world’s largest purveyor of grade-A sheepskin (About Us).”

The boots I see more often than not is the “Women’s Ultimate Tall Braid boots;” which costs $200.00 (with

UGG

free domestic ground shipping on this item) – WOW!

Children’s “Kid’s Lo Pro button Tall” boots sells for $100.00, and the “Infant Boo” is priced at $50.00 – My goodness, when did everybody get so rich?

With house foreclosing, banks/investment companies go belly-up, public debt, unemployment rates increasing, and many other businesses going down how in the heck are people affording these things?

Yes, many Americans are living off of credit cards, but it is that important to have such pricy/luxury items?

I have a friend who buys everything with the plastic card: grocery, purses, gas, coffee, utility, and etc – everything and anything that costs money, she runs the card.

Charging

I know for a fact that her husband does not make that much (and she has told me that herself in non-confidential manner) and know she cannot afford it, but she tells everybody, “It makes me feel good to have these things!”

Honestly, who doesn’t want it?  Who doesn’t want to wear nice and pretty things?  Give me a break!

However, my motto is that “If you can afford it, and then go right ahead.  As for me I didn’t win the lotto yet!”

About Us.  UGG Australia.  Retrieved from http://www.uggaustralia.com/experience/aboutUs.aspx?p=ex (1/16/2009).

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I recently came across this book “WOMEN DON’T ASK: NEGOTIATION and the GENDER DIVIDE” by Linda Babcok and Sara Laschever, and I think it’s very interesting. 

The website (womendontask.com) provides interesting statistics and perspectives of women in regards to negotiating.  

Statistical facts include:

• Rise in American jobs changed
• Increased number of women working outside of home
• 50/50 divorce rate
• Decrease in union membership
• Women’s earning (in relation to men) idle at 73.2%
• Birth rate to single mothers increased

Like most of you women out there, I do not like negotiating – it’s just not me.  My father always told me “don’t take their first offer” and taught me how to negotiate; however, I seldom practiced what he preached.

I think my father would be very disappointed, but I HATE it. 

The authors pointed out only “2.5 times more women than men said they feel ‘a great deal of apprehension’ about negotiating (http://www.womendontask.com/stats.html).” 

Other information includes:

• Men initiates more negotiations
• While men feel exhilarated about the process of negotiation, women say it’s agonizing
• Women will generally pay “as much as $1,353 to avoid negotiating the price of a car (http://www.womendontask.com/stats.html)”
• Around 22 million adult women will never negotiate

There are so much more information, but sadly I think we women pretty much know about these statistics.  We might not know the exact numbers in percentages or in dollar amounts, but … ?

Thankfully, I am married to a man who LOVES negotiating, and according to him it’s just FUN.  I don’t get it!!!

Truth of the matter is when we go out shopping together I just leave the man alone when he is negotiating – for me it’s really embarrassing. 

Don’t get me wrong I love getting discounts or free products or services, but just don’t get me involved – you know what I mean?

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I recently purchased my laptop from Best Buy a week ago.  Before I made my purchase I did my research online to see what kind of products each and every store offered – Best Buy, Circuit City, Wal-Mart, Sam’s, Office depot, and Staples. 

Honestly, I didn’t find any good deals on computers online and I knew I was not able to negotiate price reduction so I went ahead and went to each stores to negotiate prices. 

To my surprise, most of the stores did not give me price reduction (discounts) or special store offers (e.g. gift cards or free products or product program upgrade and etc). 

I honestly thought, in this economic situation, store managers would be willing to negotiate prices to entice sales.

Yes, many of these retailers did decrease their prices drastically, but my dad always told me “never take their first offer.” 

I am not much of a haggler, and frankly I hate negotiating; however, a dollar saved is a dollar made for me.  If we had two incomes coming in every month I would be less reluctant to negotiate, but it was our decision for me to stay home with our children.

Alright back to my point – when the managers weren’t willing to work with me on prices I just left the store and went to the next one.

By the time I went to Circuit City I was tired, irritated, and just wanted to end.  CC did have the product I wanted and they did have a great price point, but when I was about to check out they told me that my “laptop” had to be ordered and it’ll take a week.   

So, I asked the salesperson to find me a substitute.  Unfortunately, the closest substitute they could come up with was $80 higher than the product I liked.  I asked the manager that he should match the price, but he was not willing to do it.  So, back out the door I came in.

Funny, he was willing to sacrifice $1,500 purchase (laptop, printer, and wireless accessories) for $80?  Wow, I was speechless.

Thus, I went back to Best Buy – place I received great services, managers satisfying their customers (savings), and getting reward points, and etc.

Let me tell you … shopping for a laptop was not a fun experience; however my madness to save money paid off at the end.  I saved about $160 (discounts) and received a $30 reward points.

So, there you go – was it worth it?  My feelings says “No” since I don’t like negotiating, but “Yes” when I did save close to $200.

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My laptop finally kicked the bucket!  It had a long and good life, and I’m sure going to miss it.

Before the tragedy I have been looking for a laptop computer for a while online, but what I wanted cost little more than what I was willing to pay.

So, after an extensive research I made my shopping list – noting what brand I wanted, what kind of memory and hardware I needed, what would be nice to have, and which stores to go first. 

Like most of you, I thought I would get the best deal at either Wal-Mart or Sam’s club — Boy, I was WRONG! 
Initially I thought, “Wow, close to $900 for a computer!” 

I was shocked (thought maybe the brick-and-mortar stores would have better price than their online stores), but still thought I need to stop at other stores and will probably have to come back to get the computer from them.

So, I went to Circuit City, and the HP model similar to the ones I found at Wal-Mart cost close to $950 – so, it was a no-no.

After CC, I went to Best Buy with very little expectations.  My shopping experiences (with the sales persons) were great, but I just didn’t care for the high prices. 

I was there for a while looking, checking, and comparing what I seen from other stores.  To my surprise, their computer was around $850. 

Honestly, I couldn’t believe it.  I had this mental mindset that no one can beat Wal-Mart prices, but Best Buy sure proved me wrong!

To make sure I was buying a good product I called my friend who works at department stores selling electronic products. 

He told me that it’s better to go with Best Buy or Circuit City products rather than Wal-Mart (even though they were all selling same brand name products) because standards (quality or extra accessories/applications) and customer services are lower at Wal-Mart. 

I know … I didn’t know that either!

So, eliminate the mind set you are always going to get the best price at Wal-Mart.  Of course, I didn’t pay $850 for my laptop, and I’ll share my tricks with you on my next post.

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I am the first person in a line when it comes to getting a good deal, but I refused to be a statistics.  I dread Black-Friday after Thanksgiving sale.  People just lose their senses – waiting in lines for a day (or for hours), pushing and shoving each other, breaking down store doors because people are too anxious to get into the store, and even killing people. 

When did we become an animal?  There’s absolutely no sense of logic, rationality, safety and security. 
I think it’s important to remember that these stores are not doing YOU a favor by lowering prices – they are not giving you the TV for a free for goodness sake.  You still have to pay for it, and they are selling it for a lower cost to make their balance sheet appealing to their stakeholders. 

I understand people have little less money this year for Christmas, but if you break the numbers down you are not coming up on top.  Think about it … the hours you have to stand in line you are taking away time with your family and/or work.  I know for certain few of my friends take a day off at work and hires babysitter to go shopping on Black-Friday.  Unless you are saving over $1,000 it’s just not worth it – in my opinion anyway. 

Just this Friday a Wal-Mart worker in NY dies after being trampled by anxious customers, and at least four other people were injured (including an eight-month pregnant woman).  To make matters worse, two men pulled out guns and shot each other to death in California Toys R Us Store.

Has our life become that cheap?  So cheap that it’s okay to kill (accident or not) a person for $10 saving?  Do we no longer sympathize and empathize with the victims or their families? 

We are supposed to be living in a civilized society, but we are no better than animals on Black-Fridays.  At least we can justify the animal’s misbehaviors – they don’t know any better or it’s just their instinct or they were threatened or they are just an animal.  But, how about us?

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Tough Shopping Times

It‘s that time of the year!!  Shopping for Christmas or Holidays (now so many people call it) can be a quite an experience – both negative and positive.  Even though many of the big items are now much cheaper these days, having negative economics (let’s not call it recession – it just scares the heck out of me) breathing on our back is not helping us fulfill Merry and Jolly Christmas for our family.

I am one of the lucky moms to stay home with my children, but it does put extra pressure on my husband – one income to run the house.  So, my job (not only raising, feeding, cleaning, preparing, and etc) is to save money – to stretch his paycheck. 

I have discovered how cheap I have become with everything.  I never pay full price on clothes (never-ever), buying groceries on sale or using coupons, going through the clearance racks, stocking up on “manager’s special” items, and going through online stores: i.e. Gap/Old Navy/Children’s Place, Overstock, ebay, and Craig’s list. 

Also, when we do order pizzas or clothes online, I try to find “promotional codes,” (I usually go to www.retailmenot.com website, and most of the times it works)  to have extra discounts or free shipping or future discount codes sent out to me via email.  Last month alone I have managed to save over $100.  Yes, it is not a tremendous amount of money, but saving here and there really does add up. 

I think it’s fair to say that most of the savings we have to do is placed on the moms (I am not forgetting the dads either), and it does get quite overwhelming, and sometimes just disappointing. 

Trust me, I have read articles, books, watched TV shows, and researched online to save money, but I have discovered that it is harder to do (and sometimes impossible to do) what they are trying to tell me to do. 
For instance, guests/authors suggested double coupon days at the grocery stores – unfortunately, we do not have such stores participating on double coupon day, and the stores who offer discounted foods at lower price are dirty and are in a less than desirable neighborhood – sorry, not going to expose my children to drunks.

Also, the experts suggested going to different stores, but with such high gas prices (over $4/gal) I would be losing money at the end of the day.

Moreover, these “experts” have suggested shopping in bulks and go to the store only once a week – if something runs out than they have to wait for the next shopping trip.  I don’t know about you guys, but I do not have the heart to tell my children “sorry no milk and bread today because you guys ate them all!” 
My friend actually follows this instruction – she shops at Sam’s Club (spends about $600 to feed 8 people for two weeks), and if they run out of milk or fruit or bread they have to wait until the next shopping trip.  To break down the numbers it’s about $42.86/day or $6.12 person/day or $2.04 meal/person.

Well this works well for her family, but it does not meet our needs.  We want to expose our children to different types of foods – fruit, breads, entrees and etc.  I have discovered that going through the isle (not the junk food isles) I found many items that were on sale that were not advertised in the newspaper.  For instance, I bought organic cereal, normally costing $4.59/box, for only a $1 – so, I stocked up on them; bought organic pudding for $0.59 (normal price of @ $2.99/box); and etc.

I don’t think you have to sacrifice quality over quantity (this is a personal preference and our decision to raise our children).  Yes, it does make us feel better when you can get a more bang for your buck, but at what cost?  Isn’t this why we work so hard? 

Forget the children’s perspective or feelings for a moment – don’t you feel better when you can provide high quality foods and clothes for your children?  I am not saying you should only feed your kids organics (because I sure am not) or buy them Gucci’s or Louis Vuitton clothes (I don’t even own them), but I don’t think we should sacrifice quality when it comes to our children – we don’t even know what kind of impact we are putting in our children’s health and mind.

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